And I Didn’t Wash My Hands on the Way Out
______________________________________________
Sitting on the exam table while Dr. Wagner mixes the injection, the back is high and the padding is too firm. I’m only feet from the window and the view is beautiful. The blue of the sky is hypnotizing me… or is it his voice? It’s steady, confident, always soothing as he explains every step, telling me what I will feel, and managing me so carefully. His voice is even, but always engaged (how does he maintain that?). This voice, this assurance he has; it isn’t what you would expect if you saw him from afar. Not with his thin, pock marked face or his close cut military hairstyle. When he finishes the mixing, he stands and steps to my side. He towers over me, it makes me want to lean toward him and breathe him in, instead a stare calmly at his tie, and even though I always forget his name, I think, ‘I love him’ as I do it, but I don’t love ‘him’ really… I love his hands, his voice, his patterns, and oh yes, his needles. Twelve times he’s used them to pierce my forehead over the last 8 minutes and he has my body purring dulcet tones and turning to liquid on the inside. I think, ‘…and we haven’t even started with the filler yet (where he’ll use the real needles, the ones that go in so much deeper, but we are about to aren’t we… mmmmm)’.
My eyes are unfocused, but they still follow him as if they were at the end of aleash he’d snapped on to them. He’s holding the needle so close to my face as he explains… as he touches… here and there. It is too close to me to see it clearly; the fuzziness makes the silver appear to glow. It’s putting me into a trance. I don’t hear anything he’s saying. Something about what type of pain I will feel. ‘Don’t worry Dr. Don’t worry, not about me, don’t worry’, I think. Then the first needle goes in. I flinch, and it surprises me. There is a flash of anger directed at myself, but it dissipates in the ocean of serenity I’ve become and in the same second I become aware of it, it’s gone. Each turn seems to go deeper… jab, then probe, splitting the derma to find its way through, then pulling back toward the entry point expelling the contents in the tube of the syringe as it goes. Then again, this time he wants to change the line, he lifts the tip up, I feel the skin stretch as the needle moves sideways just under the surface, and then the tip is diving back down and I feel it sharp and forcible. I am so still inside and out, so empty, this allows the sensation to uncoil and drain through me, it can’t go far because the endorphins chase and subdue it. I stay as quite as possible, meditating my way down the line of the trail that’s been blazed, savoring every remnant.
Then the pulsing in my cunt starts and I know it won’t stop until he’s done. Sadly, only two left, but don’t get ahead, let every thought go, stay right here, right now. “How are you doing?” he asks. “iimm good”, I reply, but for a second I think, ‘does he know??’ “You’re doing great, just perfect”, he says… ‘Is he teasing me!?!?’ Then he’s finished with that and putting the last needle down.
When he turns back to me, he fits one hand on the back of my neck to brace me as he massages the filler with the other. My body is reacting like crazy to his touch, to him holding me in place like this. I’m trying not to shake. “Open your mouth”, he says. ‘Oh God, it felt so good to do it!!’ I closed my eyes when he put his finger in my mouth and kept them that way while he rubbed the finger on one hand, against the finger on the other through my cheek. I had to silently scream at myself, ‘BE STILL’ while he did the other side to keep from falling off the table as I swooned. He hands me the mirror as he makes the final touches. He is so precise; he won’t stop until the result is absolutely perfect. Then I say something to make him laugh and we start talking about how great it looks. How great I look, and he’s in a good mood and it feeds my fantasizing and I think, ‘surely I’m his favorite patient’, smiling arrogantly up at him as I do.
On the way out I check and there is a message from Master. I inhale deeply as I click to open it. It says, “I swear I can smell your cunt as I am sitting here, and it is making me feel light headed!” My face flushes as a knowing smile spreads across my face, and things below the waist start tightening again. I pass a familiar hotel and I have to duck in. I go straight to the bathroom, ‘Fuck it’s crowded’, I take a step back toward the door to leave, then someone walks out of a stall, ‘Screw it’, I turn back and quickly slip in. I fumble as I’m rushing to unzip my pants and as fast as I can get it there, my hand is on my pussy. Petting my lips with the length of my fingers, taming some of the vibration in my cells, I can think now and my first thought is, ‘Whoa my fingers are so cold’. I put one foot up on the paper holder and use my left hand flat against the wall to keep me up. One last squeeze on my pussy lips, then a couple of pats and my finger is on my clit. I have barely started rubbing when I am shocked by how instantly wide open I am, it feels amazing! Then there is a burst of energy and heat that makes me think of fireworks and its spreading out from under the finger on my clit in a rush of hot energy and the openness amplifies everything and I am crazed and then a part of me starts laughing as I realize I’m standing like a man who was taking a piss would, over a wet splattered toilet seat, and I can hear the woman that came out before me. She is talking about what a mess the seat is and explaining it was like that when she came in…
I keep rubbing and everything starts to fade and I just feel my body and it’s so incredibly fluid and responsive. I swell with pride and have this image of my clit as a large white pearl infinitely smooth when its slick. The slickness makes it impossible to keep a finger on it, but boy is fun to try! Then my degree of consciousness shifts and I feel a distinct squeeze from just below my finger, but back and much deeper inside, then there is creaminess soaking my lips and thighs. I think, ‘Oh man, oh man I’m gonna cum, I can’t believe how fast that was. How long was it 20 seconds? 40? A minute?’ My whole body is so fucking hot! I’m on fire. ‘Why didn’t I take off my coat off?’ then ‘ooOOOO oohhhhhh, and I know I’m not stopping now to do it’, my legs buckle, and in the process of keeping myself from falling to the floor my orgasm gets pushed down. ‘fuck fuck fuck! I can’t sit on the floor, I’ve got to wipe the seat and cover it, HURRY!!!’ I do and then I sit and one two three times my finger circles round I’m back on the brink again… four five six and I’m suddenly very aware of my breathing. It’s So loud – more like panting… ‘Everyone can hear it!!! What if someone opened the door, what if the door opened right now and they were all staring at me seeing me like this WILD!??!?!’… That’s it… oohhhhhh ggggoooooodd YES!! Breathing so heavy… six seven eight nine ten and I’m cumming again. My foot slips into the next stall for a minute as my legs stiffen and shoot out at the same time my back arches and I throw my head back. It hits the wall, I don’t care. I feel completely limp for a second, and then I stand and dizzily start to pull up my panties up. They smear a wet streak on my leg when they twist as I’m dragging them up my thigh. I open the door and walk out of the stall. Three ladies are standing by the sinks. They are trying not to look at me, but I see their head tilted up because I am so much taller than any of them. I look straight into the eyes of the one nearest me and smile a most wicked and satisfied smile. Walking toward the subway I can feel how soaked my panties are. I want to run… Run all the way to Brooklyn. My body vibrates with all the energy. It feels like I’m on drugs… like if I lift my arms, I will take off and fly. Master will be so proud of me.