I have a deep seeded, personal affection and unrelenting attraction to female sexual energy. Part of it is a wonderment of the immense power contained within it. Part of it is my complete fascination with all the ways that female sexual energy exists and can be expressed – ways and expressions which I as a man do not possess and am completely incapable of creating on my own. However, most of my “passion” is a result of knowing from experience that when an especially strong female sexual energy and an especially strong male sexual energy meet, that the proverbial “fireworks” really do go off.

Fireworks happen when two people meet and have really good, intuitive, connected sex – you know where the other person seems to be pushing each and every one of your buttons at just the right time and in just the right way and you are doing the same for them to the point where you both become completely and deliriously lost in the moment. It feels as if you are as close to physically merged as two beings can be. It may even feel like you connected in a profound spiritual way as well.

This is great fucking sex! It doesn’t happen always happen, and even when it does, it isn’t necessarily all that often, but experiencing it with another person is so powerful and so rewarding and feels so good and connected that the vivid memories, intense (almost overwhelming) feelings and emotions that it evokes and the “high” that you get from it can sustain even the most insatiable sexual beings days, weeks, or even years.

As much as I seek having these experiences, I also know that there is an experience which is far, far more powerful than really great “fireworks” sex.

It only occurs when two people are willing to expose their hearts and minds so thoroughly and completely that they are able to accept and embrace any and every want or need or emotion that comes up during a sexual exchange, it requires both parties to be completely and fearlessly expressed about their own wants and needs and for them to act on them right then and there without thought, it requires both parties to be attuned to (listen and accept) what the other is expressing in the moment, and it requires both people allowing themselves to get completely lost in the moment, to go on “autopilot” and allow the experience to happen without trying to control it.

These all sound really obvious and intuitive ingredients to a great sexual encounter and I guess in a sense they are, but to do it to the degree necessary to achieve what I am talking about is very difficult. It requires immense trust be placed in your partner. It requires one to be ready to face any and all of ones fears and hang-ups and accept the powerful emotions that they may dredge up. It requires one to step outside of themselves, to abandon ones sense of self or role or position or status and accept that what emerges during the experience may be far different from how they normally view themselves! Most of all, it requires people to leave any and all judgements at the door.

This type of experience is hard to find, it requires skill and patience and effort, but when it does, it makes the “fireworks” show look like a sparkler. This is a fucking Supernova level event!

During a Supernova sexual experience, time and space are virtually olbliterated.

You are so attuned to the other person that you are doing and saying things to one another that you may not have ever actually said or done in your entire life not only to this person but to anyone else. You may not have even THOUGHT of saying or doing these things to another person! That isn’t to suggest that you are saying or doing something wild or crazy or reckless (although it very well may seem so at the time) but you are simply acting and reacting to one another in that moment allowing it to go wherever it goes and doing and saying whatever makes the most sense to you without passing it through any filter or self-editing to please your “audience”. When you find yourself in a place where letting go of your “plan” and allowing your instincts to guide you and find that whatever you each are doing is driving the other wild (almost animalistic) with lust and arousal…you are well on your way to this place. This is a place filled with joy and pleasure beyond belief, but it is a scary and threatening place – it feels like a runaway freight train totally out of control! Don’t try to stop it! Anything that either of you do to try to get it back “in control” will kill your chances of ever getting there.

Fight back your perfectly logical thoughts to try and regain some control by telling yourself…”Don’t stop!”…”Don’t interfere!”…”Let it happen!”. Even when you know that this is where you want to go and know it will all be OK, it still takes every ounce of your will to not grab those reins and slow it down. You are now standing on the precipice of this place…

Win that battle with your mind, the whole thing becomes surreal…an out-of-body experience… You are fully and completely present, engaged and aware of every detail, perceiving each and every sensation instantaneously and focused on what is going on during each and every second! At the same time you are seemingly able to see anything and everything all at once from evert possible angle or perspective! Thoughts and images and feelings start flashing though your body so fast (hundreds…thousands a minute) yet you still feel like you are able to process each of them with perfect clarity…

One moment you realize that you are staring intently at the most raw and captivating visual depiction of sex you have ever seen, but this isn’t porn…this is YOUR cock buried half way down THAT woman’s throat while she is crazed with desire and literally bending over backwards slobbering with drool and gaging to suck you even further down her throat – as if she would take your entire being down her throat if it was possible! The next moment you find yourself with your eyes closed allowing wave after wave of the most intense mind-blowing pleasure surge through every nerve ending in your body over and over again, but instead of fearing that allowing it to continue will push you over the edge quicker than you would like (an absolutely enormous fear of guys), you let it continue and start to feel so in control that you start to believe that you could endure that stimulation all day if it meant this feeling would never stop. A moment later, you are completely present and lucid and in awe of what you are experiencing. The next moment you are sitting there calming observing your partners body buck and spasm and convulse with yet another all-consuming orgasm before realizing that one of your hands is tightly gripping her throat while the butt of your other hand is roughly and relentlessly grinding against her clit…your fingers are buried as deeply inside of her as you can get them and the loud slurping and slapping noises make you realize that your hands are literally dripping from her juices as you are doing this to her. The next moment you find yourself screaming in pain (real or imagined) while your partner soothes and consoles you. Seconds later you find your partner crying uncontrollably without knowing why, but you tell her its OK, to let it all out. Moments after that you feel fueled by rage and you start to fuck this person harder than you have ever fucked someone before in your life only to discover that they are doing the same to you… Fear returns as you realize that you could destroy each other but are willing to die right here, right now to prevent yourself from being destroyed!!!

Inevitably, there comes a moment which is so physically and mentally and emotionally overwhelming that you both loose control…orgasming so hard and in a way that so grips your bodies as to almost black out… a release so complete that it feels as if a lifetime of hurts and pains and frustrations and urgent needs have been let go. Wave after wave of orgasm explodes from your core followed by several minutes of endless aftershocks pulsing and jerking through both of your bodies and a sense of total and complete relief on every level of your being!

As you both start to open your eyes and regain consciousness, you start to assess what is going on. Your relief starts to turn to confusion and fear…what just happened?!?…what did we just do?…are you OK?…am I OK?…did we hurt one another?…did we break the bed?…are the sheet ruined? …why did I think of that totally unexpected, completely unrelated feeling/topic/emotion right in the middle of all of that?…why was every non-sexual feeling/emotion so intense?…holy shit that was AMAZING!!!

THAT is Supernova Sex!

I have had a fair number of Firework sexual experiences…but I have had only a three Supernova sexual experiences in my entire life. I am not complaining, as the older I get the more I realize that most people never have them. I know this because each of my Supernova experiences has been with a partner for whom it was their first. I recently had one, which is what inspired me to write this. I thought of writing about the experience itself, but realized that I couldn’t. I don’t really know what happened… For someone who is meticulous in how he thinks and observes almost every possible detail of my sexual experiences, I have a remarkably imperfect memory of the details and ordering – other than knowing that I was fully present and focused on each and every second while it happened (its almost as if I took in so much data that the memories are written over one another). I also couldn’t began to describe how many different and completely random thoughts and emotions and feelings went through me (it would take a dozen pages just to get started)…I know that my partner felt the same way…well, since she had never experienced something like that, she was mostly in shock for the next couple of days trying to process it all, philosophizing about whether she would ever experience something like that again and wondering why we were both so sore!!!

I will spend the rest of my life searching for the next Supernova experience. Along the way I expect to have some Fireworks experiences and a lot of very good sex. If I never have another Supernova – thats OK, because those experiences were so incredible that I could die tomorrow knowing that it doesn’t get any better than that!

The moral to the story is this. If it seems like I have a purpose to my stories or a specific plan or vision with what I am communicating, it is because I do, and it all relates to being thoughtful, observant, strategic and add meaning to my sexuality in a way that attempts to draw others closer to a place that is truly impossible to believe until you experience it for yourself.

Everyone here is a remarkably sexual person. Everyone here can get there if they try hard enough. Some of you may have gone there and not had to think about or discuss any of this with your partners at all (blind luck absolutely happens and doesn’t diminish the incredible experience one bit), but that wasn’t the case with me and I was shocked to discover how doubtful most people are to whether efforts to make it happen are worth it – you have no fucking idea how hard I will work to get back to that place!

When I encourage others to dig deeper, understand what is driving their feelings, express themselves more fully, have no judgements and be open to anything, its because those are all essential ingredients to finding this other world of sexual possibility. I am curious if any of the other SE readers know what I am talking about, or have anything else they could add to this topic. Either way, I am a very satisfied explorer right now and I felt obligated to put this out there so that others may become as inspired to try as I am.

James